So now to listen to as much as I can ...
"You can't fix it. You can't make it go away.
I don't know what you're going to do about it,
But I know what I'm going to do about it. I'm just
going to walk away from it. Maybe
A small part of it will die if I'm not around
feeding it anymore."
--Lew Welch
How to tell a story
Saturday, January 31, 2015
Better late than never
So now to listen to as much as I can ...
Super ZZZZ
Looking forward to rooting for double digit seeds in March Madness. Women's Oregon State only team I am following. Triple Crown and women's World Cup ahead.
Friday, January 30, 2015
A problem
BBC puts us to shame
Thursday, January 29, 2015
Recovery
Ha ha ha.
Good news: I discovered Palouse brand lentils from eastern Washington. Delicious! And in a sexy burlap bag. A new staple in my diet, I think.
Pick her up at 4, rush home ahead of traffic.
Immortal books
Life Is A Film
sometimes my life feels like
a film studies course
and I just watched a great film
a true work of art
layered and complex and engaging
like The French Lieutenant's Woman
and I loved it
but now the professor
is explaining it
scene by scene by scene
talking on and on and on
and if he talks long enough
all this redundant
unnecessary critical gibberish
surely he will ruin the film
so I want him to shut up
I want him to shut up
I want him to shut up
so we can all go home
Wednesday, January 28, 2015
June
But before then, March madness and the Triple Crown. Good diversions ahead.
posted from Bloggeroid
Andrew Sullivan
Today he announced he is leaving blogging after 15 years. One reason: to think and write more slowly. Hear, hear! Our age has lost an appreciation for brooding and slow mental processes. I applaud him and look forward to a future book surely to come.
http://dish.andrewsullivan.com/2015/01/28/a-note-to-my-readers/
Cartoon
Tuesday, January 27, 2015
Youth
as a young man
naked with a woman
it never occurred to me
I was experiencing
something transitory
something remarkable
something haunting
that as an old man
I would remember
sweetly and sadly
forever regretting
that at the time
I never got around
to thanking the gods
for the passion
of my youth
Sunday, January 25, 2015
Plan B
Sibelius! Saroyan's essay and Mozart In The Jungle both have me listening to more - and more carefully.
posted from Bloggeroid
No bbq
posted from Bloggeroid
Seahawk fans send off team
posted from Bloggeroid
Saturday, January 24, 2015
Present Tense
all around him
a man can spend
all the hours
of his day and night
in perpetual motion
never stopping
to reflect or consider
the meaning of
anything he does
posted from Bloggeroid
Terrible
posted from Bloggeroid
Existentialism = no excuses
posted from Bloggeroid
BBQ in Pdx in January???
posted from Bloggeroid
Old Flames
I had brief encounters with
a number of remarkable women
most of whom disengaged
once they realized they
could not compete with booze
and these separations caused
considerable pain and anger
an old, old story
but I have not forgotten
these women, so more evolved
than I was at the time
and I hope that somewhere
in the dark corners of memory
moments of joy and connection
emerge, not to erase pain
but to temper it with
a fuller story:
the past is neither dark nor light
experience neither wrong nor right
posted from Bloggeroid
Mornings
Read Saroyan's essay Finlandia this morning, a unique voice too ignored today (like Baldwin, a very different unique voice). Crooks introduced me to Saroyan. The romantic artist personified.
Hope to pack a box or two for VA this afternoon.
Friday, January 23, 2015
The new rhythm
H talking to doctor today in first step to get her driver's license back. I don't think she is ready - too emotionally unstable - but am staying out of it.
Thursday, January 22, 2015
Waiting room
Rio this afternoon.
Looking forward to coffee with TS tomorrow morning, grocery store afterwards for some essentials.
A boot in the butt
A forgotten publisher
Wednesday, January 21, 2015
A rare evening
I have to get boxes ready for VA pickup next week.
Tempus fugit and all that. In pretty good spirits.
A new blog
Pope v. Republicans
Thornton Wilder marveled how humans escaped crisis after crisis "by the skin of out teeth." And we shall again ... by colonizing Mars. But meanwhile, we might still salvage a few things here on earth.
The stupidity of politicians may yet save us by being SO stupid it inspires universal outrage. I see this as the only positive scenario around at the moment. The Pope speaks to millions of common folk and has an essential role here. Will cops tear gas the Pope?
I hope we get to find out. A longshot but possible. Beats no alternatives at all.
Intensity
Time to reread Brown's LOVE'S BODY, the book that explains this mess better than any I know. At the same time, as Brecht wrote, "Nothing you can do can help a dead man."
Nothing left but personal integrity, kindness and empathy, and holding onto a cosmic sense of wonder and humor for as long as possible.
Tuesday, January 20, 2015
Options
in a few years
after my wife is back on her feet
just about the time my body's breaking down
and before the food and water riots dictate the future
I'd go to sleep one night
and not wake up
the perfect ending
to a remarkable life
but unfortunately
this gift is unlikely
and I'll be around past my time
perhaps far past my time
which will force me
to take charge of the circumstances
and select the best option for departure
all options distasteful
and the sane option unavailable
in our barbaric culture
a simple peaceful pill
taken after loving goodbyes
at my farewell wake
no, I'll have to make my exit alone
with some ugly awkward final act
for which I have no skill set
for which I have no stomach
but which is the only option
left to me to leave with
some semblance of integrity
some semblance of dignity
as Socrates knew
as Robin Williams knew
the only option left
in this crumbling City on a Hill
Monday, January 19, 2015
Doubtful
http://www.cnn.com//2015/01/18/opinion/liu-mlk-day-truth-and-reconciliation/index.html
Ambition with a good early track record
Radical memory
Sunday, January 18, 2015
Walkin' the Strings
Sunday morning
Perspective
in the past
when things went my way
I usually exaggerated
their staying power
so was surprised when
success became oblivion
in the past
when things went bad for me
I usually exaggerated
the negativity of the moment
so was surprised when
everything became better
in the past
what I believed about events
usually turned out wrong
which is why today
I am wise to believe
nothing at all
Yum 2
Yum
Saturday, January 17, 2015
Etc
The danger ahead
Rainy afternoon
Retirement
We want to move to an apt where we can walk for coffee and such, and have neighbors you meet, old school. We'll have time to find the right spot.
The isolation here was great when I was writing a lot. No complaints. But time for being more in the world.
A good start
Coming Home
Cutting the chord has been great!
...H up ... now we'll see how the rest of the day is ...
Old message, no progress
History
Mary Cassatt
The Short Version
throughout my life
I've had victories, defeats
but here's what is sweetest:
I never send tweets!
Friday, January 16, 2015
Shameful
Comfort
Out of the blue
Good Fortune
Good Fortune
despite heart attacks
despite brain injuries
despite world affairs
despite human atrocities
Chris Connor still sings
a ballad that moves me
and the end of Mahagonny
feels more wise and true
than anything I know
and on a cosmic scale
these are enough for me
to count myself among those
whom the gods have blessed
Thursday, January 15, 2015
Handyman
In waiting room at Rio. H seems to be okay at end of busy day.
Roasted chicken waiting ... free range and all that.
posted from Bloggeroid
Kindle Fire TV
1. show H 's art work on the new HDTV (even as a slide show)
2. show my videos on same
How cool is that?
posted from Bloggeroid
Unusual day
posted from Bloggeroid
Wednesday, January 14, 2015
Surprises me
posted from Bloggeroid
Modern times
posted from Bloggeroid
The Artsy Fartsy Shuffle
the literary powers that be
which used to adore me
with the most exaggerated praise
with perpetual attention
and reams of good press
haven't taken interest in me
for some time now
which upset me
when it first happened
and baffled me for some time
especially since my work
was better than earlier
until it occurred to me
that none of this
not the earlier prizes
not the earlier grants
not the earlier success
had much to do with my work
but rather was a calculation
in a literary marketplace
of current trends and fashions
over which
I had no control
and Ezra Pound warned me of this
and e. e. cummings warned me
this is common knowledge
if you know where to look
so I shouldn't waste time
fretting about the past
which was a one-night stand
but also don't fret about
the present or future
and just do what I do
and thank the gods
for whatever actual connections
I make along the way
posted from Bloggeroid
Tuesday, January 13, 2015
Perspectives
when I was younger
I imagined my old age
would be this way or that
and envisioned scenarios
to look forward to
a respected writer
an influential teacher
a recipient of honors
teller of war stories
fixture at the coffee shop
but none of this
has come to pass
so here I am
navigating a nightmare
in charge by default
barely making it
at a task I'm
not very good at
when Sketch leaps up
onto my lap
to lick my nose
with great dedication
and I come to realize
that to have a nose
cherished by a dog
is not the worst moment
of the human condition
posted from Bloggeroid
Reality bites
posted from Bloggeroid
Amazon signs Woody Allen
Plus Kindle Fire TV is fantastic ... and affordable.
posted from Bloggeroid
Monday, January 12, 2015
Fiction and truth
See my essay on writing historical drama.
Lost logic
Charles, I just got an email receipt for something I didn't buy.
What is it?
X cream.
Wait, this afternoon you said you bought this.
No I didn't.
You did ... we had a list of activity at the bank site and you told me this one was legitimate.
No I didn't. I bought X cream.
That's what this is. X cream.
Oh.
posted from Bloggeroid
My o my
posted from Bloggeroid
Stress city
Man, we really don't need this.
posted from Bloggeroid
Corporate sports
http://money.cnn.com/2015/01/12/media/espn-college-football-playoff-pays-off/index.html
posted from Bloggeroid
Hear, hear
posted from Bloggeroid
Gold mine!
posted from Bloggeroid
Shockingly easy ...
It's important to know when to leave. Most jocks don't. Many performers don't.
Rocky Marciano aced it. He retired undefeated.
posted from Bloggeroid
In the meantime ...
http://www.cnn.com//2015/01/12/africa/boko-haram-deadliest-attack/index.html
posted from Bloggeroid
Some violence more press worthy than others
posted from Bloggeroid
An actual playoff
http://roundbendpress.blogspot.com/2015/01/a-real-champ.html
Wishful thinking
H to dinner and women's circle meeting tonight. I'll listen to Oregon game on radio, still astounded it's not a freebie. The new America.
posted from Bloggeroid
Sunday, January 11, 2015
For the record
http://www.cnn.com//2015/01/11/showbiz/feat-2015-golden-globes-winners-list/index.html
posted from Bloggeroid
Saturday, January 10, 2015
Stressful day
posted from Bloggeroid
Bad news
http://money.cnn.com/2015/01/08/real_estate/oregon-moving/index.html
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Perils of romance
posted from Bloggeroid
What a shocker!
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And Sen. Wayne Morse demanded an educated citizenry
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Q.E.D.
posted from Bloggeroid
Oregon fan speaks out
posted from Bloggeroid
Friday, January 9, 2015
OSU massacre
posted from Bloggeroid
Any chance?
posted from Bloggeroid
Corporate dominance
posted from Bloggeroid
Dinosaurs
Dinosaurs have an easy life:
so much ignored, so little strife.
With little I like in anything new,
I choose the past to this modern zoo.
In our day we had a good run:
met some goals and had some fun.
I'm damn proud of what I did,
my books stand up against these kids.
But few folks read them, that's the truth.
I take my gin without vermouth.
I don't pay heed to modern ways
and wallow in my glory days.
Gravity
posted from Bloggeroid
Impressed!
H has no memory of 2 weeks in "rehab boot camp" the first time!
*
Baking bread, my therapy.
Determined to do ukulele tiday! Say behind on studies - well, physically, lots of chord work in my head.
posted from Bloggeroid
Thursday, January 8, 2015
Prefer to Oscars
http://www.cnn.com//2014/12/11/showbiz/golden-globes-nominees-list/index.html
posted from Bloggeroid
Waiting room
Not enough
http://www.cnn.com//2015/01/06/us/selma-then-and-now/index.html
posted from Bloggeroid
Ah me ...
http://www.cnn.com//2015/01/08/opinion/tech-trends-changing-world-shelly-palmer/index.html
posted from Bloggeroid
Art fights back
http://www.cnn.com//2015/01/08/europe/charlie-hebdo-cartoons/index.html
posted from Bloggeroid
Duh
posted from Bloggeroid
Lament
It's time to lament
and bring out the towels
when the subject at hand
is an old man's bowels.
Taken for granted,
ignored at best,
a young man's bowels
is good fodder for jest.
Jokes of the anus,
songs of the ass,
the bowels embrace humor
that's usually crass.
Anatomical PR
is not the strong suit
of a bodily function
inspiring hoots.
But tempus fugit
and all that stuff:
there comes a time
when enough is enough.
Low in priority
for years and more,
the bowels gets a chance
to even the score.
And it's the elderly
taking the brunt
of the bowels' revenge
with telling stunts:
an old man listens
to an old friend's rants:
then quite without warning
he soils his pants!
Or sweet Aunt Mary
in the choir at church
can't find her hymn book
we all have to search
by the time we find it
such time has passed
the chapel has filled
with fartiing and gas!
And so it goes
revenge of the bowels
no more crass humor
no more crude howls
stench isn't funny
when old men are tense
they've taken to diapers
their only defense
the bowels are triumphant
the victory done
the moral: be careful
of how you make fun.
.
posted from Bloggeroid
Why is horror surprising?
posted from Bloggeroid
Kind of Blue
From Round Bend Press site.
Wednesday, January 7, 2015
Today's experiment
posted from Bloggeroid
O say can you see
posted from Bloggeroid
Big game
A very bad precedence beginning here.
posted from Bloggeroid
Attack on satirical magazine
http://www.cnn.com//2015/01/07/europe/france-satire-magazine-gunfire/index.html
posted from Bloggeroid
Tuesday, January 6, 2015
In Tucson ...
posted from Bloggeroid
Waiting room
posted from Bloggeroid
Possibilities
posted from Bloggeroid
Monday, January 5, 2015
The fun begins
posted from Bloggeroid
Getting more intrresting ...
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Echoes
He saw Pbs show on environmental theater, wrote to say I was "far ahead of my time." Ha ha. One critic even credits me with coining term "hyperdrama." Try cashing these at the grocery store.
Want to send him a couple of my books, he would dig them, esp the army one.
Oh boy ...
posted from Bloggeroid
The American way
posted from Bloggeroid
Day freed up
posted from Bloggeroid
Sunday, January 4, 2015
Our new tech
We've replaced it with a low end smart hdtv, a kindle fire tv and our own low end tivo. Our basic monthly fee goes from 100 to 15 a month.
What we lose are the sports cable channels I watched. What we gain are high def and amazon prime on a big screen instead of tablet.
Kindle Fire TV is fantastic.
Low end hdtv looks miraculous to tech dinosaurs like us. Jaw dropping picture.
A smart move! Football playoff in HD at home ... wow. 40" screen is perfect for us.
A smart move! ( And back to radio for most sports.)
posted from Bloggeroid
Optimists
posted from Bloggeroid
What we like to forget
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The Chef
There's a barbecue in heaven, haven't you heard?
A new chef has called the angels together
and delighted them with chicken and ribs.
They sing for their supper, a chorus of contentment
and a karma of kindness beams into the darkness.
Here on earth, in the silence of grief,
I hear the heavenly chorus
and feel the good karma
and smile, knowing that Tee
still conducts music at the grill,
spreading joy with chicken and ribs,
and a smile, and a gigantic heart,
and only his home address has changed.
Low key
She hasn't started painting again. Won't let me do her laundry but she doesn't do it either, though she complains about it a lot.
It's walking on eggshells around here ... I do the best I can but doesn't seem to move us forward.
posted from Bloggeroid
Cutting the cord
H back to bed.
posted from Bloggeroid
O well
posted from Bloggeroid
Saturday, January 3, 2015
Future of film
http://www.cnn.com//2014/12/09/tech/innovation/virtual-reality-sundance-2015/index.html
posted from Bloggeroid
Hear, hear!
http://www.cnn.com//2014/12/31/living/cnn-ideas-stillness/index.html
posted from Bloggeroid
Hear, hear!
http://www.cnn.com//2015/01/01/tech/cnn-10-ideas-dying/index.html
posted from Bloggeroid
Memory to be remembered
posted from Bloggeroid
Mahagonny ... brilliant production!
I endorse this review ...
Can you spell "schmuck"? That's what I was calling myself ten minutes into the performance. It is, simply, the most intelligent production of this "opera" I have seen (pray, be not impressed; I've seen only three others, but I've re-seen them many times).
Conducting: one couldn't wish for better. The cast: not one dud amoung them, not a one (check out Jenny's trill in "Moon of Alabama" - it is to swoon). The mise en scene? Oh, man, don't get me started. It's like a Broadway show; it's like the best of contemporary opera; it's like the old 60's days of the Living Theater. Yet it's too something "also" on which right now I can't put my finger. To borrow a phrase from Talulah B, it's a goddamn miracle. The chorus? Spot on.
Underlying all is the translation of Brecht's libretto into American English. It's superb, comperable to the translation (Blitzstein's ?) of the Threepenny Opera that put Weill/Brecht on the Manhattan scene back in the 50's. For a while my Inner Purist (who can be SUCH a bore!) fussed about losing the German...until I remembered that Weill, upon coming to Manhattan and claiming a historical place among Broadway's greats, being so ashamed of his native country rolling over for the Nazis, refused to speak a word of German. That made it all right. That made it OK. In this performance, Mahoganny, takes its place in musical history in an entirely new context: Weill in Manhattan. I think he would have loved it.
But all that's intellectual twaddle. If you have a love for Weill and his works, please do not deny yourself the pleasure of this performance. And don't expect a better one anytime soon.
I know of none better, though I know of one very close.
Madrid, bravo!
Er...make that bravissimi! Tutti!
R.I.P.
http://www.cnn.com//2014/01/09/world/gallery/people-we-lost-2014/index.html
posted from Bloggeroid
Survival
http://www.cnn.com//2014/07/15/opinion/aldrin-my-moon-walk-mars/index.html
posted from Bloggeroid
Here's mine ...
http://www.cnn.com//2014/12/30/living/america-in-five-words-twitter/index.html
City On A Hill sucks.
posted from Bloggeroid
Noted earlier, obit
http://www.cnn.com//2015/01/02/showbiz/little-jimmy-dickens-obit/index.html
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Reality
http://www.cnn.com//2015/01/02/us/gallery/skid-row-portraits/index.html
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Musical medicine
Who knows what will happen when H returns.
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Sixties debacle
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Progressive energy
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Baking bread to Chris Connor
posted from Bloggeroid
Friday, January 2, 2015
Stress
posted from Bloggeroid
Post-Rio rehab ...
posted from Bloggeroid
Rhetoric v. reality
posted from Bloggeroid
Mornings
2015 definitely a year for change. Hope we sell the house for a good price in Sept, find an apt in a neighborhood with walking convenience. I'll never convince H to move to the southwest.
posted from Bloggeroid
How reality works
Yes, God does play dice with our lives.
See my 1985 play The Sadness of Einstein.
Lack of character
I'm more interested in women's bball now.
posted from Bloggeroid
Thursday, January 1, 2015
Oregon v. Ohio State
posted from Bloggeroid
Fat chance
posted from Bloggeroid
I nailed it
posted from Bloggeroid
Good start
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Ha ha
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Hiss boo
Big day
Hey, I saw in the New Year! First time in ages. Low key, at home, watching public tv specials, counting our blessings.
Go Ducks!
posted from Bloggeroid